Seasons of discontent

This is a devotional I wrote for a writing lesson. But I have been pondering this subject for a while. Why is it that we are all so quick to want the next best thing? That hottest gadget? The newest project? The high mountain top experiences of life? When in reality, God has called us here, in the valleys and plains to live for Him, giving Him all glory without all the excitement we crave.

Luke 21:34 (Amp.) “But take heed to yourselves and be on your guard, lest your hearts be overburdened and depressed (weighed down) with the giddiness and headache and nausea of self-indulgence, drunkenness, and worldly worries and cares pertaining to the business of this life…”

As I plucked another dead head off the late summer blooms of the marigolds in my garden, I paused. These happy yellow flowers that are so hardy to bloom from spring to frost had become little more than a chore to me. I no longer delighted in their beauty; I no longer cared for seeing their sunny faces in my garden.

As I went back to the task at hand, twisting the heads off while trying to keep the rest of the plant intact, I pondered how easily I am discontent with life.

In the dark cold months of late winter I eagerly pour over flower catalogs, oohing and aahing over the new varieties and the incredible colors. They bring light to the dreary, short days. And in the spring I am always anxiously awaiting that last frost date so I fill my garden with luscious flowers. I coddle the new plants as babies, watering and feeding diligently. By mid-summer I can look at my flowerbeds and enjoy the abundant beauty.

But by late August to early September, I am ready to move on; I am weary of this job. It is the season of my discontent.

Now I tend to the beds out of duty rather than devotion. Feeding has all but stopped. Weeding as well. Now I feel restless, and like the turning of the leaves, I too want to move on to something different. I want to let go of this task which was once a joy and now only a drudgery.

And as I paused in my picking off the dead blooms, the Lord spoke to me. I tire much too quickly of the things which should be beauty in my life, things He planted to be enjoyed and blessed by. Things I now only consider mundane, boring, menial, and unrewarding.

As I received the prick off conviction, I recognized my own careless response to the Lord. Everything He has called me to or brought into my life is there for a purpose. But how quick I am to abandon something because I’m bored or tired of it.

In our society we are all programmed to want the quick fix, the instant dinner, the fastest modem, the newest video game. If a computer is two years old, it’s ancient. We get impatient with a microwave dinner that takes two minutes instead of one. The frantic pace we run at now only beckons us on down the road of discontent. How will we ever learn to abide or endure?

As I returned to the care of my garden, I looked up, grateful for the perseverance and patience the Lord is teaching me, even in the midst of every day tasks. And I reached down to inhale once more the sweet aroma of one more bloom before turning to the next plant needing my care.

Lord, teach us to number our days as you do. Teach us to slow down, to wait upon you, and to take time to be quiet. Help us to have the perseverance to see something all the way through with joy and contentment instead of buying into the agitation of our world. You are still the God who calls to us, saying: “Be still and know that I am God.”

Blessings!

Changes

Well, we got our daughter safely moved in at school. After a hot, sweaty day of moving multiple loads up three flights of stairs, and lots of arranging, and helping, she was settled. Of course later that night her boyfriend came up to see her with the help of her suite mate, they rearranged her room again. Makes me wonder why we spent so much time doing it the first time! :P

Of course this was somewhat to be expected since she is my girl and I am one to move things around multiple times to figure out how I want a room to look. I am happy she made the room her own.

As far as emotions here ... I am doing remarkably well. Maybe it has to do with going through this once before ... maybe it's being busy with a new job ... maybe it's because she has called home at least once per day since Tuesday! Girls are certainly different than guys.

It's funny because we miss her, miss touching base about her day, yet we are all doing okay too. Even her younger sister, the poetic drama queen, said I haven't felt like crying because the heavens have been doing it for me. (It's been raining a bunch!)

Actually this time and season is such a mixture of emotions; grief because we miss our kids, knowing that life will never look the same again. And as I told the youngest, just because it's different doesn't mean it's not good too.

Yet, I also feel such pride and joy seeing our daughter stepping out into the path the Lord has for her. What an exciting time for her. New classes, new friends, new places. As I told her, it's kind of like a big, long camp. With homework!

My job is going well, still learning the ropes. It's different because while I have worked as a freelance editor for a few years, I have done only what's requested per my instructions. Now I am the one giving the directions! I have the final say-so on all the products coming across my desk. And while I like having the power to change things that need changing, it is also somewhat intimidating. Daily as I am heading to work, I am asking the Lord to anoint what I am doing, that I would be a tool used by Him for His glory alone.

Well, enough rambling for tonight.

Blessings

Updates from busy life

Interesting time at our house. So busy with the comings and goings that it seems we barely have time to catch our breath. And I wonder why I am trying to blog in the midst of this and I will come across someone who asks about it and mentions that they read it and are encouraged. So I will continue on.

In the last couple of weeks our son returned to Oklahoma. Last week our youngest started her sophomore year of high school, I started a new job, and older daughter finished working for the summer. This is our next transition. Our lovely daughter moves on campus on Tuesday.

I think I am still in denial. All the shopping is mostly done. The packing is pretty well finished. I am very excited for her and eager to hear all the wonderful things the Lord will do this year in her and through her. And I am not thinking about kissing her goodnight tonight or tomorrow night because I think I will lose it. As a matter of fact, I know I will. Kissing our kids goodnight has been such a ritual since they were babies.

Her dad always run through the familiar sleep tight, sweet dreams, see you in the morning, don't let the bed bugs bite, I love you, goodnight. Who loves you most? Jesus. And who else loves you? You do. Who is my precious little lady? I am.

My routine is from a book that we recite in unison: I love you forever, I like you for always, as long as I'm living, my baby you'll be.

And tomorrow night will be the last time I will say that to her on a nightly basis.

I went through this transition with my son and I find it no easier with the second child. When they return home from school, we may still say our goodnights, but the routine, the sweetness of daily familiarity is broken, never to be the same.

And so, I am dreading the goodnights. The days will be busy, full of school, work, activities. It is the bedtime when I miss my kids the most. I guess that is pretty normal for most moms. And somewhere down the road, it becomes "normal" to not have them around to say goodnight to. Sad, but true.

So I'd appreciate prayers for our transitions over the next few days and weeks.

Blessings.