Saturday, December 5, 2009

Random thoughts

Just to keep my few readers in continued shock that I am actually blogging's today's random thoughts.

Golden Retrievers are some of the most amazing dogs. Smart, loyal, loving, and so funny. Asher was proudly parading around the house with the string from a balloon in his mouth, balloon floating above him , saying look at me, aren't I great? Silly dog. :)

I am again astounded, amazed and grateful when I see a word of the Lord coming true. I have been going through a rough season for a while, not fully understanding all of it. Part of it certainly came from some things at my work. The Lord told me about a month ago to hang on, there would be changes by the first of the year. He didn't tell me what kind of changes. Well, this past Thursday there were some major changes announced. I stand in awe that the Lord of all the universe would stoop to encourage my heart with such a specific word. How good He is to us.

Can't believe my baby is 18 years old. I know I sound like an old woman when I say, where did the years go? My full-time mothering years are waning rapidly. While I know there are seasons for everything, I have to say that being a full time mom was absolutely one of the greatest delights of my life. I LOVED being at home, raising my kids. And the amazing people they are today is a testimony of God's faithfulness.

Off to do some online Christmas shopping.

Monday, November 30, 2009

God uses imperfect vessels

We all go through tough times—those Red Sea moments, if you will when you feel stuck between a rock and hard place and it seems as though nothing will change.

I felt the Spirit leading me share briefly with a few others about the difficult time my marriage went through a few years ago. The thing I always come back to when I think of that time, is that despite the pain of that season, I wouldn't trade it now. What God worked in my own heart (much less my husband's or our marriage) is now more precious to me than gold. I know in a much more intimate and solid way that He is my rock. He is solid ground for me no matter what I face.

Today, because I obeyed in speaking of what I have been embarrassed and even ashamed of—my own brokenness—God used what I spoke of to minister to another soul who is facing a breaking marriage. What I had spoken of gave her hope, gave her courage to ask questions, hopefully helped her shake the shame and embarrassment she was feeling. I pray for the restoration of this marriage—I told her God is able to do the impossible. I've seen it; I've lived it.

I guess the point that hit me today is how we all try to hide our brokenness, whatever the situation may be. I felt shame and embarrassment during that time. Like I had let, was letting, the Lord down. I was tarnishing His good name.

While there are times that our actions can certainly do that, more and more what I am seeing is that it is in our very brokenness, when we have nothing to hold onto anymore—that is where God loves to shine. And He heals our brokenness and He calls us to share it with one another. It is not my "together" life that is going to help another hurting person. It's me being real and letting God shine through all the warts, pain, sorrow, and sin. Because then, He truly gets all the glory.

He loves to use imperfect vessels. I pray you choose to let Him use you.


Saturday, November 28, 2009

Life goes on...

Last night we were talking with our almost 18-year-old daughter. She expressed so well what we are all feeling as we mourn with the family who just lost their daughter. She noted how it's good to have a busy day today to take her mind off of the grief she is feeling for this family. At the same time, how incredibly callous it feels that life goes on.

I have felt the same way. Both in this difficult circumstance as well as when my mom lost her husband a few years back. I felt that it was cruel for the sun to rise and set as normal; for children to play; for the mail to be delivered. At the same time, it is those very normal activities that draw the grieving back into life. I stand in awe of our God who is so wise to work things out this way.

And so, life does go on...for our loving Father is the giver of all life and He does it in big and small ways. So today, I thank Him for sustaining the mourning family, granting them strength for the moment. And I thank Him for the daily rhythm that will gradually call each hurting heart back into life. I continue to pray for a healthy grieving process for them, in whatever time and way they need.


Friday, November 27, 2009

Time of Thanksgiving and mourning

I have so much to be eternally grateful for and have really been spending time thanking God for so much the last few days. Salvation, His continued transformation of our lives, my husband, my son and his wife, my two beautiful daughters. Our nation, our soldiers and their families. God's over all goodness to His creation.

Today, I learned of the passing of a lovely 17-year-old girl after a valiant fight with cancer. My heart mourns with this family. We have known them for several years, as our son and the older sister were friends in high school. We are weeping and grieving as though we had deep relationship with Lindsay and her family. Yet we don't.

But praying for Lindsay as she fought cancer over the last couple of years has totally captured our hearts. From my husband to my almost 18-year-old daughter, to me, we have been interceding deeply for Lindsay and her family. I find this so amazing that our God would so trust His children to intercede and come along side people who are going though incredible difficulties. What a great God we serve that He cares so much to express His heart through to hurting ones through us, even if from a distance.

And so I continue on in gratefulness, while mourning this lovely young lady. Please pray for Lindsay's family as they walk through this time of grief.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Finding time...

I am having a hard time finding time to do the things that nourish my heart or "sharpen the saw" in Steven Covey terms. It seems like we just keep getting busier and busier and time slows for no man. :)

Anyway tonight I was working on one of my guild lessons and while I have found most of the lessons really helpful and felt that I learned something from each of them... I must say that screenwriting should be labeled screamwriting for me. :p

I have other things I want/need to write and yet I can't seem to find the motivation when I do actually have the time. And with summer here and two girls at home, there seems to always be someone around. Don't get me wrong, I love having the girls home. I also like time alone since I seem to need that to think and write.

When I tried to explain to my husband about how I need to get lost in the writing world I am creating, he didn't get it at first. I told him that when I am writing fiction (or even some non-fiction), I get immersed in the world and interruptions (yes, even little ones) stop the flow of thoughts and ideas.

Just a day or two later he sent me this quote: “The author in his book must be like God in his universe, everywhere present and nowhere visible.” – Gustave Flaubert (French Novelist). I appreciate his encouragement to me.

I am planning to get a few articles written this weekend for a magazine that I think would be a good fit for my writing and my passion. That's about all on the writing front for now. Besides trying to find time to get into my protagonist's head and talk with her some more. I may just take Saturday as a writing sabbatical and run away somewhere (close) and spend the day writing.


Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Good book...

I borrowed a book from my boss at work called Family Driven Faith: Doing What It Takes to Raise Sons and Daughters Who Walk with God by Voddie T. Baucham Jr. (Hardcover - Jun 7, 2007). This is an excellent book outlining the dire need our children have to be trained up in the ways of the Lord, just as we were instructed in Deuteronomy 6.

As the author points out, parents today have the tendency to turn our children over the "experts" be they the local school, private coaches, or youth ministries. Why do we parents think that someone else is supposed to do the hard work in teaching and training our children?

As I look back on the years when my kids were young, there were some things we did right: we read in the Word daily and tried to incorporate it into our lives. But as the kids got older and busier, I see how I dropped the ball and did not pursue time with each of them in the Word or even necessarily discussing what we individually were reading. Not sure when and how we got off course in that, but we did.

I am grateful that all three kids truly love the Lord and yet even now I want to come along side and share with them what the Lord is teaching me and what He is teaching them. I guess the thing is that we let the busyness of life crowd out the important things in life.

Anyway, if you want a good, convicting read to encourage you to invest in building and nurturing godly children and relationships, take a look at this book.


Tuesday, May 20, 2008


I attended the Colorado Christian Writers Conference this past week and had a fabulous time. It always amazes me what the Lord has in store.

Of course I learned a ton about writing. But part of what I learned as well is how far I've come since my first writing conference in 2006. Back then I was easily intimidated by other writers, especially those famous ones teaching at Glen Eyrie. But I was also easily discouraged by my lack of understanding about writing techniques. I have always learned things fairly quickly when I put something into practice on a regular basis but back then, any word of critique set me to wondering if I was supposed to write.

This time, I still see how very far I have to go and how many basic things I still need to get under my belt. But it didn't discourage me in the least. It only made me more certain. King David once said that he wouldn't offer the Lord something that cost him nothing. Guess I have learned that about writing. It will cost me time and practice, and even more importantly, it will cost me vulnerability. Something I am not overly fond of. :)

Back to this year's conference: I learned so much from instructors like Jeff Gerke who was very knowledgeable as well as a laugh a minute. But I must say my favorite was getting to know Angela Hunt and Nancy Rue. What incredible women! We talked of writing, families, and many other things. These ladies know how to delve into deep and sometimes painful things, and write of them in a way that brings life to others. They also know how to see humor in everyday occurrences. We laughed till tears were rolling down my cheeks.

Another "God" moment was connecting me with an editor of a magazine that wants me to write for her. I couldn't have planned it or orchestrated how naturally this happened.

The next couple of weeks will be spent regrouping, studying, reading, and analyzing before I begin more serious writing using the building blocks I learned this past week.