Senior Breakfast

Yesterday we attended our daughter’s senior breakfast that included a capping ceremony. Before the ceremony, each student attending (which unfortunately wasn’t the whole class) was asked pick an individual who has been important in her life and to write whatever she wanted to express to that person. During the ceremony, the student invited that special person to put his cap on while his appreciation for that person was read aloud.

Our daughter chose her dad, which is no surprise since she is definitely a daddy’s girl. I was thrilled to be the one taking pictures. My daughter has been generous this year with expressing her appreciation to us, so what she wrote was only confirmation to us. But what moved me to tears was the sight of seeing over 125 young adults telling someone thanks.

There were the obviously moving ones: the daughter who thanked her dad who was her role model. She wrote that he has missed many important events in her life because he is serving our nation in the army. She was grateful he was here for this one.

Or the young lady who wrote proudly of how her mom has defied the doctor’s prognosis to her when he said she’d never see one child graduate from high school due to congenital heart failure. The daughter exulted, “And I’m number two!”

Or the student who picked her fifth grade teacher because she had encouraged the student when she was shy and insecure. The girl wrote that her teacher taught her it was okay to offer an answer that might be wrong and to keep learning through that too. There were students who picked a Young Life director, former and current teachers, an aunt, a sister, a brother, a grandmother; people who were instrumental in moving these teens forward in life.

There were countless students honoring dads, saying they were their heroes because they taught their sons and daughters to work hard, to believe in themselves, to stand strong even when times are tough, to dream, knowing that the parent will always support them.

There were students who honored moms for always being there, for being their best friend, for always being available to talk, for requiring them to do well in school, for believing the student could achieve when he didn’t think he could.

There were the funny comments too: You always told me, I still like you no matter what anyone else says about you. Or, you made me get out of bed every morning. Or, you kept pushing me even when I was a brat about it. And my favorite: You put diapers on my dirty behind, Mom, so I figured you could handle this cap too.

The thing that moved me the most wasn’t necessarily the specific sentiments that the kids expressed. The amazing thing to me was jock or drama queen, nerd or Mohawk-haired skater, valedictorian or the student barely getting to graduation, every one of these adolescents was grateful to at least one adult who had affected their lives and helped them reach this milestone.

The significance was a message we adults need to understand: Our efforts are not in vain. It matters every time I spend time with, talk with, hang out with, require of the kids in my world. They need adults who will believe in them and require of them, adults who can push them to give their best. In this mixed-up world we live in, so many voices are telling the youth today that they will not succeed, that their efforts don’t matter.

This is what I heard loud and clear at the breakfast: it is our voices they really want to hear and they really do listen to. They hear us even when they rebel against advice given, even when they seem to ignore it. Every investment I make in a young person’s life has lasting value even if I never see it.